Today is November 15 a day of significance to me since it was the due date of the last baby I lost…we called her Leah. It’s amazing to be 20 weeks pregnant this day with Leah’s sister and I am most grateful for it. Get this, though… a very interesting twist in it all is that my due date for Hope is the same day that I lost Baby Leah. What are the odds? I am due to give birth to my new baby girl 2 years to the day that I lost my last one. Oh, and to make it even more interesting I conceived this baby on or very near the due date of my second loss, Baby Liam…unbelievable. It all shows me the very Hand of God and how He reveals it to us in so many of the details. I don’t believe it is in any way a coincidence…He is so good to us!

Almost 19 weeks and still scared…how can this be? I really thought conquering the first trimester was going to be smooth sailing through the rest of the pregnancy. I was wrong. Now I don’t feel her often like my others or I have an asthma attack and decide that she is not getting enough oxygen or I’ve lost a few pounds and so she isn’t thriving. The worries come at me from everywhere. I’ve realized that this baby struggle is not over and won’t be until I hold her in my arms and see her with my own eyes. So I find myself clinging to the name that the LORD gave me for her in week 4. I’m clinging to Hope. The hope I have in Him will be forever embodied in this little girl. We have hope in Him no matter what the circumstances and I just needed to remind myself of that today.